Stopping the Tattling

tattle tale meme

I’m always amazed at how many of my sixth graders still tattle.  While I want them to report certain behaviors, sometimes it’s not really necessary.

We had a counselor a number of years ago who had a really good strategy for helping students decide whether to report a behavior.  He called it the 3 Ds.  The students needed to ask themselves whether the behavior is Dangerous, Destructive, or Disturbing.  If so, it should be reported to an adult.stopping the tattling www.mrsfenger.wordpress.com

I still use this in my classroom today.  I teach it to the students at the beginning of the year.  We discuss what each of the terms mean and then go over examples and non-examples.  For instance, if a student is going to tell me that he saw someone using pen when they are supposed to use pencil, that would be a non-example.  We discuss together why that’s not really dangerous, disturbing or destructive.  On the other hand, if they see a student hurting another student, that would be appropriate to report.

 

no more tattling www.mrsfenger.wordpress.comI also talk to them about the fact that we are a team and we help each other.  Therefore, they need to report anything that does fit the 3 Ds.  Otherwise, someone or something could get hurt or damaged, and since we work together, we don’t want that.  I make a point of dealing with any behavior that is reported.  This builds trust in the students and they are more willing to report problem behavior in the future.

Between building a family kind of feeling and teaching them explicitly what should be reported, the students have a clear expectation that if they report something, it will be addressed.  I often ask students if they believe that I will deal with it, and they always say yes, they believe it.  That’s the real key, is following through after something has been reported.  Sometimes, it takes as little as a quick conversation with the other student (often they don’t realize they shouldn’t do whatever it was).  Sometimes it make require a phone call home.  Either way, the students can rest assured that it has been dealt with.

This has worked wonders with my students.  I get very little tattling, but they are clear that I want to hear about things that fit the 3 Ds.

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